As my children navigate their life journey, I hope they carry with them the invaluable lessons learned from my unwavering determination, compassion, and love. Here are 8 things I hope my motherly strength has taught them:
1. The value of independence. I hope they learn that they don’t need a significant other to save or care for them as adults. I want them to want to share their life, not need to. The distinct difference between “want” and “need” are two things I hope they understand to the core. I hope they learn to build a home, raise kids, do housework, volunteer, have a healthy relationship and loyal friends while having a successful career for themselves.
2. The meaning of unconditional love. I hope they see how their mom sacrifices her time, her health, and her youth for them, yet never complains about the path she chose. They will undoubtedly know that I always happily gave more and more of myself for their success. I hope my consistent actions teach them what selfless and unconditional love looks like, so they can recognize unhealthy, toxic situations as they grow into adulthood.
3. How to love yourself. By watching me grow through my most challenging years, I hope they have learned how to walk away from the things that are not meant for them, how to keep going even when it feels like the whole world around them is falling apart, and how to believe in themself when many may be doubting them. I hope they learn that bad grades, heartbreaks, not getting chosen for teams, and failures don’t define who they are but give them the fire to try harder next time because they believe they are worthy of greatness.
What defines you is how you bounce back from all the setbacks by believing in yourself and how hard you fight for the life you want.
4. That you can be both strong and soft. Strong mothers are usually very sensitive – we just hide it better. But my kids saw me silently cry over their pain, stay up all night taking care of them even when I was sick myself or the nights I didn’t sleep because I was working nonstop to build us a new life. I hope they feel that I always built them up when they were down, provided the tenderness they needed when hurt, and allowed them to see that I am human and hurt too, but I rose from all my pain rather than let it hold me down.
5. That everything isn’t always fair, but you move forward anyways. I openly speak to them about the realities that I have had to face as a woman, a single mom, an entrepreneur, etc because I want my kids to be prepared for it, not oblivious to it. I hope they learn that their opinion will be discounted at times, some opportunities probably will go to someone less deserving, they may end up in the wrong place at the wrong time and that they may not be taken seriously because their feelings are louder (feelings is something I have taught them to embrace). But rather than being made bitter by any of this, by knowing it I hope they learn how to stand out in a crowd, have a voice that builds trust and actions that earn respect. They will undoubtedly discover that what doesn’t kill you can most definitely make you stronger if you see the challenge as a mountain to climb not a brick wall to stop you.
6. Learn never to look back unless they want to remind themselves how far they have come. By watching me navigate my hard choices, I hope they learn to let all the “what ifs” and “could have beens” go. I want them to not focus on looking back and wondering why life turned upside down. But to always keep looking forward and let the past teach them how to move in a better direction. I hope they pick up the stones thrown at them and build something great with them!
7. How to create their happiness. I want them to believe they can find joy in a difficult time. I hope they learned that even through our challenging years and moments of uncertainty, I intentionally created a life of happiness. Hopefully, they saw that it is possible to be happy even if you are stressed or uncertain while living through sad times. I hope they look back and say my mom taught me I can always find something to be happy about. All I have to do is look a little closer or from a different perspective.
Hope they look back and say my mom taught me I can always find something to be happy about.
8. How to be a good parent. They were raised by a mom who showed them how to care for a family, who showed them that hard work truly pays off and that you can love someone unconditionally with zero strings attached. I hope I have led by example – because more than anything, I want them to be a strong, protective, kind, gentle, loving and compassionate parent to their own kids.
May they always embrace challenges life brings them as opportunities for growth, approach adversity with grace, and understand the power of building meaningful connections. Here’s to the hope that the strength they observe in their mom becomes the foundation for their own incredible life!
What life lessons do you hope your children learn from observing you?
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That’s a beautiful list. I am sure your kids will surely have these amazing qualities. Kids learn from their parents.
It is so good to look back and think about what they have learned and the positives!
As a fellow mom, I deeply resonate with your words and appreciate your vulnerability in discussing such important life lessons.
So beautifully put and well said. I think these are foundational values every parent should instill in their children or aspire to at least. Thank you for sharing!
By emphasizing the distinction between “want” and “need,” she instills a strong sense of self-reliance and resilience in her children, empowering them to navigate adulthood with confidence and purpose. This touching reflection serves as a poignant reminder of the enduring impact of a mother’s strength and guidance.
I definitely feel you on everything. Especially learning never to look back unless they want to reminded on how far they’ve come. I’m sure your children will be great from what I’ve just read!
Totally agree 💯 with most of your points shared here in bringing up kids. no matter how much we love them, giving them the correct values to guide them always the key. Cheers SiennyLovesDrawing
I loved reading this post and it looks like you are teaching your kids whats right!! Especially #5. Nothing is fair in life and you learn from it and grow.
This is such a lovely written post. A strong mother can teach so much and I know that kids will grow better for it as a result.
I wish all of this for my children too. Parenting is hard work and I hope when they grow up they see and learn from everything that I have given them. I really want them to grow up knowing how to be strong adults.
We’ve been given an incredible power being a parent. These are all great things you list. Raising kids is not always easy, but being a good, strong role model is a good start.
Your list is awesome I am sure tat your children will have such amazing qualities. Children learn from parents and their teachings.
This hits me right in the feels. So hard. I’ve done my best to show my kids what a strong, resilient, compassionate woman looks like, and I hope I’ve done a good job of that.